Political Humor and Satire

[Tortoise]

A couple of good ones today:

CDC: 'Just Because You Got The Vaccine Doesn't Mean You Should Go Outside Or Ever Experience Joy Again'

Conservatives Sit Down For A Relaxing Evening Of Being Insulted By Every Major Corporation In America

[Tortoise]

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[Kbg]

I saw a pretty funny meme the other day which instantly reminded me of the board.

If you ever get lost in the wilderness start talking about taxation and a libertarian will seemingly appear out of nowhere to start arguing with you.

[InsuranceGuy]

[deleted]

[Smith1776]

Gotcha, lefties.

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[Tortoise]

Dangerous Conspiracy Theorist Doesn't Believe Vaccines Work

[Tortoise]

Fauci Calls The Bill Of Rights A 'Public Health Crisis'

Along with climate change, racial injustice, and student loans, the Bill of Rights should be declared a "public health emergency," Fauci said in his comments on an interview with CNN.

[Tortoise]

Fauci on mask patrol

[Tortoise]

Dr. Fauci Gets In Heated Debate With Seventeen Previous Versions Of Himself

(At this point, I should really just rename this thread Fauci Humor and Satire...)

[Tortoise]

Concerns Raised About Election Integrity After Biden Wins 80 Million Votes For NYC Mayor

[vnatale]

Dr. Fauci Gets In Heated Debate With Seventeen Previous Versions Of Himself

(At this point, I should really just rename this thread Fauci Humor and Satire...)

From the book: Nightmare Scenario...


August 27, 2020

CONFIRMED US COVID-19 CASES: 5,800,000

CONFIRMED US COVID-19 DEATHS: 180,000

Anthony Stephen Fauci slid the blade of a bronze letter opener under the flap of a white legal-sized envelope and slit it across the top. Inside was a single sheet of paper, folded into thirds. When he pulled it out and opened it, a cloud of white powder wafted into the air. It settled downward, coating his chin, his tie, his suit, and his desk.

Fauci froze in his black leather chair, quickly assessing his predicament. He could be covered in nothing. Or he could be covered in death.

There are three possibilities here, he thought. This could be anthrax. There’s an antibiotic I can take for a month and a half, and I’ll probably be fine. This could be a hoax, someone trying to scare me. I’ll be fine. But if it’s ricin, that’s bad. There is no antidote. A dose of purified ricin equivalent to a few grains of salt is enough to kill someone. If it’s ricin, I’m screwed. I’m a dead duck.

Fauci cautiously walked to his office door and yelled for his assistant, Kimberly Barasch, to summon his security detail. Moments later, a security official came barreling down the hallway to find Fauci standing in the doorway, covered in powder.

“Don’t go any farther!” he barked at Fauci. “Stay in the room!” He didn’t want Fauci to contaminate anything or anyone else.

Several other officials clad in hazardous material suits arrived soon after Barasch and one other person nearby had to evacuate, a cautionary step to ensure that no one else got hurt. The team covered Fauci in a chemical spray to decontaminate his clothing and prevent the mysterious substance from drifting farther into the air. Then they led him into another office, where they had set up a portable shower.

It was August 2020. The seventy-nine-year-old doctor, one of the most famous people in the United States at the time, stripped to his underwear and was doused with chemicals in an effort to save his life. He was then instructed to take off his underwear and finish cleaning the remainder of his body by himself.

This was shaping up to be one of the deadliest years in US history. And each day, thousands of letters addressed to Fauci arrived at the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases, where he was the director. The vast majority of these letters praised him, while a small number called him some version of Satan and wished him dead.

And then there were the letters sent to his house in suburban Washington, D.C., presumably by internet sleuths who had found his address online. He carried those envelopes to the NIH office each day, placing them in a pile on his desk until he had a brief moment to relax and look at them. This letter had been sitting in that stack, with his home address typed in a strange font.

These were extraordinary times, and Fauci was omnipresent in public six months into the novel coronavirus pandemic. Bespectacled and bookish, for months he had been explaining to Americans that yes, this virus was very much something to worry about, even as President Trump and his top aides had insisted it would all go away and everything would be fine. Fauci had never been more loved. Or more hated. He had become America’s doctor but also a foil to the mercurial and tempestuous president who was waging a war against science, a war that the United States was losing badly. The virus had killed more than 180,000 Americans as of that day, and close to 6 million others had become sick.

Fauci’s public and private pleas for the American people—and the White House—to take the virus more seriously had made him an acutely polarizing figure. It was a far cry from the dark days of the AIDS epidemic in the 1980s, when Fauci had become the target of activists’ ire. Back then, protesters outside his office window had shouted, “Fire Fauci! Fire Fauci!,” but those same protesters had believed deeply in science.

This was something entirely different. Now he was receiving death threats. His wife and daughters were receiving various forms of harassment, including obscene texts and letters. So there he stood in something that looked like a swimming pool for toddlers, naked and stunned, unsure as to how it would all end.

Fauci had no idea that another envelope with white powder had arrived in the mailbox of Robert Redfield, the director of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. And between ten and twenty letters were arriving each week at the home mailbox of Deborah Birx, the White House’s Coronavirus Task Force coordinator. Some of them instructed her to hang herself. The existence of these letters, however, was kept confidential.

How had it come to this? What had happened to the country?

After Fauci finished the decontamination process, he was given a hazmat suit to wear. He is five feet, seven inches tall, but the suit had been designed for someone 7 inches taller. As he made his way down the hallway to the elevator and into the basement to go to the NIH showers to further rinse off the decontaminant he had been sprayed down with in his office, the legs of the suit dragged on the floor behind him.

After a twenty-five-minute shower, Fauci put on surgical scrubs and a coat. He called Dr. Christine Grady, his wife, best friend, and confidante. “Please don’t get upset,” he told her, explaining the situation. “Don’t panic.”

A scientist and medical expert herself, Grady knew, just as Fauci did, that there were only three options: anthrax, ricin, or a hoax. Her husband could either be completely fine or soon fall fatally ill.

Fauci’s security detail drove him back home, where he waited with Grady for the toxicology results.

A few hours later, his phone rang and he was given the all clear. No proteins had been detected in the powder. That meant it wasn’t anthrax or ricin or anything else poisonous. It appeared to be a hoax, some sort of cosmetic or makeup powder.

Fauci took a deep breath and exhaled. His office was being decontaminated. So he continued his work from home.

[vnatale]

From the book: Nightmare Scenario...

By pushing back on the president’s misstatements and obfuscations about miracle cures and how quickly a vaccine would become available, Fauci had drawn the ire of Trump, his aides, and his legions of followers. Fauci and others on the task force were not always perfect, and they sometimes misspoke. Some of their statements and assumptions about the virus were later disproven, often because the novel coronavirus upended scientists’ understanding of how these viruses behaved.

And some health advisers contorted themselves to avoid rebuking Trump in public, either cowed by the president or because they had convinced themselves that the only way to remain influential was to bite their tongues. They wanted to serve as a check against the misinformation that often began in the White House and then took on a life of its own. But for many Americans, refusing to speak up more vociferously and refusing to correct and challenge the president at every turn was an unforgivable act of cowardice and an act of betrayal to the United States.

The puff of powder that floated into the air that August day in front of Fauci’s face was the physical manifestation of this year from hell. Trump had had enough of Fauci, and so had his followers. The nation was so divided that people could no longer agree on a basic set of facts. Either you were with Trump and trusted that the coronavirus could be ignored, or you listened to the experts and thought that Trump was an archvillain.

As the nation’s leader, Trump played a key role in the disastrous response. But the failures extended far beyond him. There were imperfect government officials, trying their best against a dysfunctional federal bureaucracy to lead the country out of the morass and save lives. There were also officials who cast themselves in Trump’s image, adopting his bullying and self-preservation tactics to survive the year. And there were still more who were well intentioned but simply weren’t the right leaders for this moment.

[Mark Leavy]

Vinny,
This is the humor and satire thread.

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[vnatale]

Vinny,
This is the humor and satire thread.


3690_plate.jpg

Esteemed Forum Police Captain Mark L!

I realize that. But some humor is not humor if it so misstates the facts. Then the "humor" is simply spreading more disinformation.

[Mark Leavy]

I realize that. But some humor is not humor if it so misstates the facts. Then the "humor" is simply spreading more disinformation.

Sir, this is an Arby's.

[Tortoise]

[vnatale]

Love it!!!!

[Kbg]

Nicely done, that there is some good humor.

[vnatale]

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[Kriegsspiel]

Legos

LOL, they gave them guns.

[pp4me]

Love it!!!!

Where can I buy one of these for my grandkids?

Actually my great grandkids. My grandkids are way too old for Legos.

[Tortoise]

Where can I buy one of these for my grandkids?

Actually my great grandkids. My grandkids are way too old for Legos.

Unfortunately, it's not a real Lego set. It's a meme that's been floating around since about Jan 8th, but I didn't see it until recently.

The humor in this Lego meme apparently transcends political boundaries. We may have finally found the Great Unifier for our divided nation.

[stuper1]

How many people will see that Lego meme and then think that the people who wandered into the Capitol really were carrying guns? Greater than 50% wouldn't surprise me.

[pp4me]

Love it!!!!

Where can I buy one of these for my grandkids?

Actually my great grandkids. My grandkids are way too old for Legos.

I thought maybe the FBI/DOJ was selling it on Amazon so they could put whoever bought it on the no-fly list.

[sophie]

My current favorite from the Babylon Bee:

https://babylonbee.com/news/governor-ab ... ave-texas/

And I posted this before but it's still hilarious. Jon Stewart is refreshingly untied to any particular political ideology, and here's the result:

https://youtu.be/6GvDAzV_dtg

Lordy how I miss his shows!!!!