Dealing With Setbacks in Life

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Smith1776
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Re: Dealing With Setbacks in Life

Post by Smith1776 » Wed Dec 04, 2019 7:07 pm

ochotona wrote: ↑
Wed Dec 04, 2019 7:00 pm
Doesn't Vancouver have a reasonably good public transit system? I'm not understanding the needing to corral family and friends carpools. Down here in Houston, yes... but Vancouver? Where do you live (approximately), where do you work (approximately)? Disclosure - I am a transit geek.
I will PM you so as to not reveal too much information publicly.

Long story short, I have a very weird work and lifestyle and traveling constantly is a big part of it. In addition to my regular job I am also a performer in music, stand up comedy, and theatre. I will have to recalibrate what I can reasonably expect to do for a while.
geaux saints wrote: ↑
Wed Dec 04, 2019 7:03 pm
Smith,

I don't have any good advice (or bad advice, for that matter) for you; I just wanted to let you know that I am pulling for you and that you seem like the caliber of person who will get through this just fine. I hope you will keep us posted!
Thank you. I really appreciate the thoughts and support. I am unsure of what I am going to do, but I am trying my best to stay composed.
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Re: Dealing With Setbacks in Life

Post by vnatale » Wed Dec 04, 2019 7:37 pm

Smith1776 wrote: ↑
Wed Dec 04, 2019 6:02 pm
MangoMan wrote: ↑
Wed Dec 04, 2019 5:48 pm
I agree with Stuper. Taking your license away for 5 months for what amounts to cell phone violations seems extreme. A good lawyer that deals with traffic offenses (maybe a DUI guy?) should be able to get you off with some fines and a hefty legal bill.
I sure hope that this is the case. I have talked to several lawyers this afternoon. The consensus seems to be that through a professional legal defence, a reduction to a two month ban is a reasonable expectation. Maybe 3; maybe 1; maybe even revoked entirely if i'm extremely lucky.

Still, the prices quoted have been all over the map and I don't know how to ascertain "value" for the dollar I am spending. So far I've been quoted everything from $2,500 for a senior lawyer to $500 for an articled student.
There is that saying, "You get what you pay for." But not always true in the case of professional services. That $500 option could possibly provide equal or better services than the $2,500. Or, maybe not.

I just found this after a quick Bing search: https://www.jonwelbornlaw.com/7-things- ... et-lawyer/.

I'd encourage you to do a more thorough search.

And, I am astounded at the severity of the penalty compared to the actual violations.

Getting back to the lawyer search....I'd also talk / email / communicate with everyone you can to tell them your situation to see if you can get any recommendations based upon their personal experience.

Good luck! Hoping for the best for you: Least legal fees plus the entire thing revoked!

Vinny
Above provided by: Vinny, who always says: "I only regret that I have but one lap to give to my cats." AND "I'm a more-is-more person."
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Re: Dealing With Setbacks in Life

Post by Smith1776 » Thu Dec 05, 2019 3:11 pm

vnatale wrote: ↑
Wed Dec 04, 2019 7:37 pm
There is that saying, "You get what you pay for." But not always true in the case of professional services. That $500 option could possibly provide equal or better services than the $2,500. Or, maybe not.

I just found this after a quick Bing search: https://www.jonwelbornlaw.com/7-things- ... et-lawyer/.

I'd encourage you to do a more thorough search.

And, I am astounded at the severity of the penalty compared to the actual violations.

Getting back to the lawyer search....I'd also talk / email / communicate with everyone you can to tell them your situation to see if you can get any recommendations based upon their personal experience.

Good luck! Hoping for the best for you: Least legal fees plus the entire thing revoked!

Vinny
Thank you for the kind words.

I am coming to a tentative conclusion that, beyond experience, one of the key factors to consider with hiring a lawyer is how much time they spend with you. The more time they spend with you and talking to you, the more they can personalize their argument to your particular circumstances. This is in contrast to a lawyer that simply uses boiler plate arguments to defend you.

I am now calling back many of the lawyers I have spoken with to ask them this key question.
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Re: Dealing With Setbacks in Life

Post by dualstow » Thu Dec 05, 2019 9:31 pm

Missed this whole thread until tonight.

Keep us posted, Smithers, and good luck!
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Re: Dealing With Setbacks in Life

Post by Tortoise » Thu Dec 05, 2019 11:16 pm

Buy a good road bike and commute with your quads, bro.
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Re: Dealing With Setbacks in Life

Post by Smith1776 » Fri Dec 06, 2019 12:09 am

Tortoise wrote: ↑
Thu Dec 05, 2019 11:16 pm
Buy a good road bike and commute with your quads, bro.
I appreciate the suggestion, but the time it would take for me to bike to and from work would be totally unfeasible. It would be like a doing a marathon everyday, where travel times exceeded even the length of my shifts. Not practical unfortunately.
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Re: Dealing With Setbacks in Life

Post by Tortoise » Fri Dec 06, 2019 3:05 am

It was mostly a tongue-in-cheek suggestion. I figured your commutes were probably way too far for cycling to be feasible.

Best of luck fighting the citations or figuring out how to deal with the 5 months without a driver’s license. That would stress me out, too.
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Re: Dealing With Setbacks in Life

Post by WiseOne » Fri Dec 06, 2019 1:15 pm

Sorry to hear that Smith, it is a little shocking how heavy handed that judgment is.

For $500 I think I'd go the lawyer route to get 3 months shaved off that suspension, but I'm not sure I'd do it for $2500. That buys a lot of rideshares. Have you checked into ridesharing in Vancouver lately? I heard they're finally allowing Uber and Lyft in. And, Vancouver has a pretty good public transportation system, which I've also used.

Why don't you turn this major downer (and believe me, the lawyer route will NOT be fun) into a positive exploration of how to get around in Vancouver without a car? Biking, taxi, rideshares, bus, trains, walking etc are all out there for you to discover. The city even has bike sharing (like NYC does) so you don't necessarily have to buy or store a bike. And, rideshare companies typically have frequent-flier type passes which help limit the costs.

Who knows, you may end up deciding you don't need a car after all! That's already a financially realistic choice in many cities - certainly here in NYC, but also (surprisingly) in Los Angeles, where many people have just given up trying to drive due to the insane levels of congestion. And Vancouver is also known as a city that is car-free-compatible.
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Re: Dealing With Setbacks in Life

Post by boglerdude » Sun Dec 08, 2019 11:17 pm

The judge will let you drive if you need to for work. Maybe ask on Nextdoor for a lawyer rec.

Also public transit + ebike/scooter. And/or walking, it might be easier than you think to walk a couple miles, and you'll lose weight
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Re: Dealing With Setbacks in Life

Post by Smith1776 » Thu Dec 12, 2019 2:33 am

Just a quick post about how my situation so far:

1) I have often thought to myself: the things in life that seem like they'll be so great, are often not that great when you finally achieve/acquire them. And the things in life that you think are so bad, are often not that bad once they've actually happened. I have to say that this is indeed the case with this license suspension. I've had to make some adjustments, but the world didn't end. I am still living and breathing, and I am still pursuing my goals. Life just sort of goes on.

2) I have experienced an outpouring of generosity from friends and family offering to help me. Honestly, this incident has made me feel more loved than my last birthday party, special event, etc. This has spurred me on to wanting to pay this generosity forward next time someone needs help. I am incredibly grateful to everyone offering to lend me a hand.

3) Waiting before hiring a lawyer has been a good call. After the initial panic, I am able to make a more rational decision now that I have better perspective.

Will let you guys know how this develops over time. ^-^
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Re: Dealing With Setbacks in Life

Post by dualstow » Thu Dec 12, 2019 6:32 am

Smith1776 wrote: ↑
Thu Dec 12, 2019 2:33 am
Just a quick post about how my situation so far:

1) I have often thought to myself: the things in life that seem like they'll be so great, are often not that great when you finally achieve/acquire them. And the things in life that you think are so bad, are often not that bad once they've actually happened. I have to say that this is indeed the case with this license suspension. I've had to make some adjustments, but the world didn't end. I am still living and breathing, and I am still pursuing my goals. Life just sort of goes on.

2) I have experienced an outpouring of generosity from friends and family offering to help me. Honestly, this incident has made me feel more loved than my last birthday party, special event, etc. This has spurred me on to wanting to pay this generosity forward next time someone needs help. I am incredibly grateful to everyone offering to lend me a hand.

3) Waiting before hiring a lawyer has been a good call. After the initial panic, I am able to make a more rational decision now that I have better perspective.

Will let you guys know how this develops over time. ^-^
How are you getting to work in the meantime?
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Re: Dealing With Setbacks in Life

Post by WiseOne » Thu Dec 12, 2019 8:32 am

Ebike is a great idea! Or a minibike (motor-driven) that doesn't require a license like a full-on motorcycle.

Those can turn what might seem to be a painful, long bike commute into something very doable. And like motorcycles you can legally weave around cars so in heavy traffic you probably might even get to work faster.

Assuming of course they're not banned in Vancouver the way they are in NYC. I think NYC banned them because they didn't want competition for the subways or the city's bikeshare system.
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Re: Dealing With Setbacks in Life

Post by Smith1776 » Thu Dec 12, 2019 1:29 pm

dualstow wrote: ↑
Thu Dec 12, 2019 6:32 am

How are you getting to work in the meantime?
My current commute is a mish mash of transit, rides from friends, rides from family, and changing my availability for work to more opportune times.

It has not been a great experience, but I've been able to make it work so far. Again, everyone around me has just been so generous with helping me.

I may have mentioned this before: but I actually do quite a bit of performing such as stand up comedy. I have a friend from the class that I took who's willing to book gigs for the same events as me so that she can always give me a ride. Serendipitous and so grateful.

EDIT: I will add that I am also incredibly grateful for the stability of the PP in times like this. I am having to drawdown on my savings during this time in order to fund unexpected costs that are connected to this incident. I can't imagine how much harder this situation would be with a more volatile portfolio.
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Re: Dealing With Setbacks in Life

Post by Smith1776 » Thu Dec 12, 2019 1:45 pm

WiseOne wrote: ↑
Thu Dec 12, 2019 8:32 am
Ebike is a great idea! Or a minibike (motor-driven) that doesn't require a license like a full-on motorcycle.

Those can turn what might seem to be a painful, long bike commute into something very doable. And like motorcycles you can legally weave around cars so in heavy traffic you probably might even get to work faster.

Assuming of course they're not banned in Vancouver the way they are in NYC. I think NYC banned them because they didn't want competition for the subways or the city's bikeshare system.
I did not consider an Ebike option! I just checked: no license of any kind at all is required to ride an e-bike. I actually will look into this as transport for those longer distances.

One thing I am hoping to get out of this situation: maybe, just maybe, I can design my life so that when I get my license back, I won't even WANT my car back. And I can save a bundle on insurance, gas, maintenance, etc.
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Re: Dealing With Setbacks in Life

Post by dualstow » Thu Dec 12, 2019 2:53 pm

My brother used to take an e-bike to work. He would use the electric option on the way there so as not to get sweaty before work, and then pedal home at the end of the day.
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Re: Dealing With Setbacks in Life

Post by Smith1776 » Tue Dec 17, 2019 3:00 pm

Just another update on my experiences so far.

So I've gone through and hired a lawyer. I ended up going with the middle of the road option in terms of pricing. Not the most expensive lawyer, but not the cheapest either.

It seems, at least in my area, that the market for lawyers is quite "efficient". More experienced lawyers charge similar sums while less experienced lawyers all seem to charge similar amounts as well.

For me, that meant the midrange option was a junior associate lawyer with a few years experience. The higher end of the spectrum would be a senior lawyer with a decade plus under their belt. The most affordable route would be an articling student -- someone who has graduated law school but hasn't passed the bar.

My overall emotional and mental state is much better now, despite not being able to drive. I've gone through enough of an adjustment period that it's not SO bad. I've tightened my belt a bit: I don't eat out anymore; I've pared down music lessons to 30 minutes a week instead of 60 minutes; and I do more affordable things when hanging out with friends.

Overall, I've tried to make this as positive an experience as possible. This incident has basically put me through a crash course in basic law, and I've met some interesting and nice people on transit. Dare I say this has been... almost... fun?
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Re: Dealing With Setbacks in Life

Post by Cortopassi » Tue Dec 17, 2019 4:14 pm

I rode every nice day this past summer. Bafang BBS02 mid drive motor. Completely silent. Cruises at 20+MPH easy. I typically did a decent amount of pedal assist, then I'd turn it down, and go hard for 30 seconds, about 5x times during the ride. Kept me in good shape. 15 minute commute. Car took 11 minutes. Too cold now. I don't like riding in cold.

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Re: Dealing With Setbacks in Life

Post by dualstow » Tue Dec 17, 2019 5:15 pm

Wow, Smithers, you have a lot of extracurricular activities: bodybuilding, music and stand-up at least.
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Re: Dealing With Setbacks in Life

Post by Smith1776 » Tue Dec 17, 2019 8:03 pm

dualstow wrote: ↑
Tue Dec 17, 2019 5:15 pm
Wow, Smithers, you have a lot of extracurricular activities: bodybuilding, music and stand-up at least.
Yes, people do mention that often when I get into conversations about hobbies and such.

The first impression that people sometimes get is that it seems impressive. However, there's an uncomfortable truth behind having lots of interests: you end up being a jack of all trades and a master of none.

Suppose it's true that becoming a master at anything really takes 10,000 hours of practice. It's pretty hard to hit 10,000 hours when you're pulled in a dozen different directions.

To be fair, by invoking the Pareto Principle, one might argue that 80% of the skill of a master can be extracted from the first 2,000 hours.

Still, I think I might need to pare down and focus more! It's a trade off for sure.
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Re: Dealing With Setbacks in Life

Post by vnatale » Tue Dec 17, 2019 8:07 pm

Smith1776 wrote: ↑
Tue Dec 17, 2019 8:03 pm
dualstow wrote: ↑
Tue Dec 17, 2019 5:15 pm
Wow, Smithers, you have a lot of extracurricular activities: bodybuilding, music and stand-up at least.
Yes, people do mention that often when I get into conversations about hobbies and such.

The first impression that people sometimes get is that it seems impressive. However, there's an uncomfortable truth behind having lots of interests: you end up being a jack of all trades and a master of none.

Suppose it's true that becoming a master at anything really takes 10,000 hours of practice. It's pretty hard to hit 10,000 hours when you're pulled in a dozen different directions.

To be fair, by invoking the Pareto Principle, one might argue that 80% of the skill of a master can be extracted from the first 2,000 hours.

Still, I think I might need to pare down and focus more! It's a trade off for sure.
When I originally read about that "10,000 hour" rule in Gladwell's book I unquestionably accepted it because he wrote it. Subsequently I found out it was not true.

Do an internet search and you'll see article like this all over the place: https://www.vox.com/science-and-health/ ... e-debunked

I think, though, I still believe in Pareto's rule.

Vinny
Above provided by: Vinny, who always says: "I only regret that I have but one lap to give to my cats." AND "I'm a more-is-more person."
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Re: Dealing With Setbacks in Life

Post by Smith1776 » Tue Dec 17, 2019 8:12 pm

vnatale wrote: ↑
Tue Dec 17, 2019 8:07 pm


When I originally read about that "10,000 hour" rule in Gladwell's book I unquestionably accepted it because he wrote it. Subsequently I found out it was not true.

Do an internet search and you'll see article like this all over the place: https://www.vox.com/science-and-health/ ... e-debunked

I think, though, I still believe in Pareto's rule.

Vinny

Thanks for this, Vinny! Very fascinating article.

Assuming the assertions of the author are correct, I find it to be a bittersweet conclusion.

On the one hand, as the author says, we shouldn't have to hold ourselves to an impossible standard. That's great.

On the other hand, the piece concedes that even incredible practice and determination may, in some cases, not be enough to overcome someone else's tremendous natural talent. That's kind of disheartening.
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Re: Dealing With Setbacks in Life

Post by vnatale » Tue Dec 17, 2019 8:51 pm

Smith1776 wrote: ↑
Tue Dec 17, 2019 8:12 pm
vnatale wrote: ↑
Tue Dec 17, 2019 8:07 pm


When I originally read about that "10,000 hour" rule in Gladwell's book I unquestionably accepted it because he wrote it. Subsequently I found out it was not true.

Do an internet search and you'll see article like this all over the place: https://www.vox.com/science-and-health/ ... e-debunked

I think, though, I still believe in Pareto's rule.

Vinny

Thanks for this, Vinny! Very fascinating article.

Assuming the assertions of the author are correct, I find it to be a bittersweet conclusion.

On the one hand, as the author says, we shouldn't have to hold ourselves to an impossible standard. That's great.

On the other hand, the piece concedes that even incredible practice and determination may, in some cases, not be enough to overcome someone else's tremendous natural talent. That's kind of disheartening.
In my experience, I'd amend the "in some cases" to "in many cases".

Vinny
Above provided by: Vinny, who always says: "I only regret that I have but one lap to give to my cats." AND "I'm a more-is-more person."
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Re: Dealing With Setbacks in Life

Post by Smith1776 » Thu Jan 09, 2020 8:23 pm

Just an update for you, my Internet friends.

My defence package was finally completed by my lawyer and myself and has been sent in. That part is done. A big weight of paperwork is off my shoulders. We'll see what the results are soon.

I went in to see ICBC today. A couple setbacks.

First, due to clerical error, it appears there has been an improper debt outstanding on my file for a while now. One of my tickets (which I had paid for), has been deemed long overdue because some boneheaded person didn't enter my file number correctly. Fortunately I kept the paper invoice. However, it's unclear what impact this may have had on my credit score in interim.

Second, due to a similar foul up, my suspension hasn't officially started until TODAY. So that entire month of me not driving since I started this thread? Yup, that hasn't counted for squat. I'm beyond irate.

I'm trying my best to use this time as constructively as possible. One of my heroes, Bruce Lee, injured his back so badly that it made him bedridden for some 6 months. No martial arts. No working out. Nothing. He turned that stumbling block into a stepping stone by reading and writing prolifically.

I'm trying to do something similar by taking this suspension time to accelerate the completion of my computer science studies.

I hope everyone else is having a better start to 2020! :o
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Re: Dealing With Setbacks in Life

Post by dualstow » Thu Jan 09, 2020 9:11 pm

Crazy!
I had something similar happen to me with city taxes once.
I suddenly have a strange craving for unagi.
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Re: Dealing With Setbacks in Life

Post by Smith1776 » Fri Jan 10, 2020 3:15 pm

dualstow wrote: ↑
Thu Jan 09, 2020 9:11 pm
Crazy!
I had something similar happen to me with city taxes once.
I suddenly have a strange craving for unagi.
I am seriously considering moving to Alberta when this is done and through.

Lower cost of living, and I actually know quite a few people who live there now through some happenstance.

And now that I'm focusing a bit more on singing and stand up comedy rather than acting, there's less reason for me stay here in Hollywood North.
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